Precious and few

I have been writing songs since my teens, when I first learned to play guitar. I write more when I have a band to write for, as I do now. And before this band, I had not been writing very much. So the new set of songs for a new band feels like a new start in a lot of ways.

Over the years, I've written lots of songs about love lost, love found, and love I couldn't have. Also lust. Let's not forget lust. I've written angry political songs and angry personal songs. I've even written political love songs!

The new songs cover some of the same territory, though in a different way. I'm older now. I'm in a different "head space," as we used to say. Among the songs, however, I have noticed a whole new topic: friendship. Not only friendship between women, but especially friendship between women.

In "Paralyzed," the narrator tries to help a friend who stays with an abusive partner. "Secrets" is about being a confidential, empathic listener for a friend who needs one. And in one I just wrote called "You Turned Back" (which might or might not be for the band), the narrator wants to help a friend who is giving up too easily.

I never used to write songs like this. I'm pretty sure I'll write more.

I moved to this area almost 18 years ago, and I was fairly isolated for many years after. I started to change that five or so years ago. I made connections at a couple of schools I attended, through Girls and Ladies rock camps, and through Meetup.com. Some of those connections have turned into true friendships. And there are many other people who, even though I don't spend much time with them, always make me feel that I'm someone they are happy to see. And I am happy to see them.

Part of the improvement came through changing me. I finally reached the point where I felt that I was worth being friends with. I had to both love and like myself before anyone would be a real friend to me. I also had to risk being hurt. Risk might bring hurt but also brings rewards.

I cherish my friends! They and the bond between us are very important to me. I hope they know that. I try to show them, but I imagine I don't always succeed. The great thing about real friends, though, is that they forgive you. And you forgive them. None of us is perfect, but all of us can love.

I don't necessarily think there is any great purpose to my life. I'm neither a theist nor a fatalist. But whenever I think in those terms, it seems to me that I am here to interact with other people, to be a positive force in their lives. There is hardly anything that means more to me than interaction and communication. And with friends, the interaction and communication can go deeper. I so appreciate that.

This one goes out to the ones I love.


Dave said...

To live on the basis of continuing to grow, and take risks and cherish and develop the bonds of friendships sound like a purpose to me. If not, it is certainly a good way to be a great musician.
Live large Véronique!

Ellena said...

Don't know who said that we can't go back and start a new beginning but we can start anything today to make a new ending. I guess you know that.